Wednesday, November 10, 2010


So, I had a migraine that well, was by far the worst I have ever had. I have had migraines in the past, this was not like that at all. It was like an explosion. Woke me up at 3:30. I thought I was dying. Obviously ER personnel don't put that on a priority list because I sat there for three a dark room with my husband and no one ever came in to check. Anyway, had to have a shot to relieve the pain. I have never had a headache that took me to the hospital or the ER rather.

So this has side lined me for two days now, but it's getting better. Now I just feel like I have a hangover or something. The shot put me out for about 8 or 9 hours. Out like a light I tell ya.

So, feeling better, but still have a nagging pain on the right side of my head!

Peace out peeps

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Just a little frustrated!

Yes, I am frustrated. Not disillusioned, just frustrated. Been working out like an animal with this zumba thing. Been dieting with weight watchers. After two weeks....gained three pounds. What a pisser!!! I mean, REALLY? SERIOUSLY? Oh, I know the garbage about building muscle....blah blah blah....Had someone tell me, well one pound of muscle weighs more than one pound of fat! ARE YOU SERIOUS? One pound of muscle weighs one pound of fat weighs one pound.......And this person was college educated and taught school for 30 years. No wonder my son never like math.

Anyway, back on the subject.....I know the physical aspects of what's going on with my body, but I'm a spoiled brat and I want to see results now!! No beating around the bush here. I am having a blast with this zumba craze. Me and two friends went to the YMCA last night to a different class. Let me just say.........IT KICKED OUR ASSES! What are we? STUPID? Yes we are! Oh we thought we were something and were gonna go to a different class and just be able to do it. NOPE....This woman, first of all, is some kind of freak...with springs built into her feet, I am sure. No one can be that damned perky and bouncy without some kind of bionic adjustments that have been made to her legs/feet. Oh, and the crunches/hip thrusts....well, if I had done that, I would've dislocated a hip or something. HOWEVER...I felt good when I was done. Could barely move, but was feeling good. Not very sore today, which is a surprise. Mostly I feel like crap today because of the sinus junk. Now zumba has helped loosen up this crap, but it hasn't helped get rid of it!!

So there's my latest on my zumba infatuation. One of the teachers I work with is now going and she was having issues with her hips.....She says she is not having near the issues. Her doctor told her to keep it up. Even if she can never do the steps like they can, she needs to just keep moving. Try'll like it!

Peace out

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Having a BLAST!!

Okay, so I have no clue how long I am going to be on this high, but I am going to enjoy it the entire time. What am I babbling about you ask? (Okay, maybe you didn't but I am going to tell you anyway) ZUMBA! It is so much fun. Even last night after packing and moving my son and his wife for two days straight. After straining my back and feeling like I couldn't move another muscle. After giving myself many, many excuses not to go............I WENT! Now, it was a struggle last night. I felt like I was running through mud (or dancing actually), but I felt AMAZING after I was finished and very proud I followed through and went to the class.

As my earlier post mentioned, I have some social anxiety issues and have had for years.....most of my life actually. The fear has always controlled my life and I can't help but think maybe, JUST MAYBE, I am beginning to control the fear. I still VERY self-conscious and I still know that I have two left feet. Now steps are getting easier and I am catching on, but several things are still hard for me, mainly because of my size. BUT THE BIGGEST AND BEST PART? I know this and I know if I keep working at this, my coordination level will rise and hopefully my size will fall!! I am still overwhelmed with the fact that I am actually doing this. I have always been the one to bow out, not get involved, watched as everyone else was having a wonderful time while I sat there wishing it were me out there. God I hope this is me stepping through a new door and finding a whole new world out there! I am tired of not doing the things that I want to do for fear of__________________. There are many things and many things could be added to that blank.

I have also noticed that my fear of speaking out, or speaking up, or talking in front of people has diminished. With work, I have no problem speaking up or standing up for myself when necessary.........So hopefully this is me standing up to myself and telling myself to quit being the wallflower and start dancing!! No longer willing to sit on the sidelines and watch my life go by. I want to be involved!

I HIGHLY RECOMMEND that anyone out there take a Zumba class. If you are worried about judgemental people...........I say "SCREW 'EM!" We have as much right to do these classes as anyone else!!

A few other things I have gotten over:

Well, I have these really ugly toes....yes I know, seems stupid, but for years and I do mean YEARS, I wouldn't wear sandals because in high school this idiot teased me about my toes. So, no cute sandals. NO pedicures. No nothing. Well, guess what? I don't care anymore. I don't like my toes anymore than I ever did, however, if you don't like them, keep it to yourself and KISS MY ASS! Okay, had to vent.

ALSO:...........I have suffered years and years and years during the summer because of my fat legs. I would not wear shorts. Mostly I wore jeans. Not any more. For about the past 5 or 6 years, I wear shorts when I want to dammit. Again, why should I be uncomfortable because of what someone might think? It's taken a lot of soul searching......a lot of getting pissed......and finally I realized I am worth doing things for me and not worrying about whether or not someone else thinks I am fat or have ugly feet or am totally uncoordinated and can't dance. Well, I'm not as uncoordinated as I thought I was......My toes, while ugly, hardly ever get noticed, and my fat thighs......guess what? not the fattest around.......So, I'm learning. It's taken 46 years...but I'm learning.~!
Peace out peeps!

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